The ears are senseless that should give us hearing, To tell him his commandment is fulfill’d That Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are dead.

Who does the first ambassador think needs to hear this news? I mean – let’s say I had some news to deliver to, say, Meryl Streep. I turn up at Meryl’s place and she, along with her entire family are dead on the ground. And instead of processing what is in front of me, I say, “Meryl’s ears are no longer working so I can’t tell her the news about her dog’s leukemia – that her dog has been put down. Who do I talk to about that?”

Meanwhile, the only people left at Meryl’s house are her daughter’s college friend and her personal assistant who surely can only gesture to the carnage before them. I mean, shame about the dog’s leukemia – but have you looked around you?

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