Is their length the key bit of info here?
I mean – I’d think you’d want a different length depending on how tall or short you are. If you’re really small, a long foil is a liability. It would be harder to control, I think.

But then, I am not a sword fighter. I have done some sword fighting, though and I KNOW I would not like to have a particularly long sword. You can hit from farther away, sure – but you’ll lose a measure of control, the farther away from your center of gravity the center of the sword’s gravity is.

I like the slight anthropomorphihization of the sword. Here it is with the ability to LIKE Hamlet, I mean who wouldn’t? What self-respecting sword wouldn’t nestle itself happily in the grip of Hamlet’s hand?

“I like Hamlet!” it says as it makes itself at home in his hand. “I always dreamed that it would be Hamlet that would choose me and here I am, the luckiest sword on the sword table!”

“Gee whiz, I am one lucky sword. What a good day. Hamlet is the best guy. What a Prince. Literally! Get it? He’s the Prince of Denmark and also a prince of a man. I mean. He is the best. Best guy. Gosh, I like this guy. Such a guy. Lucky sword with the best guy.”

It is curious that Shakespeare takes such pains to tell us that Laertes is a better fighter. Osric tells us. Horatio tells us. Hamlet tells us here. The king is about to tell us in this next bit and has told us in the way he’s built the wager. The numbers of ways we are told that Hamlet is bound to lose this fight are MANY – and from Hamlet himself, too – though he has made it clear that he thinks he has a shot due to his continual practice since Laertes went to France.

But…it is interesting that Shakespeare has taken so many pains to make sure we know who is favored to win this duel. I suspect it’s so that it’s clear that the hit that Hamlet gets is a surprise to all of them. And it makes Hamlet the underdog in the fight, which always makes people root for him even harder than they might anyway. It’s an early sports movie motif, I guess. With more exciting language.

How does he know the wager very well?

Because Osric told him.

Is this an opportunity for Hamlet to mess with Osric some more? He’s clearly present – the king has just told him to give them the foils. I’m guessing that this line would have to reference Osric somehow – either Hamlet delivers part of it TO Osric or nods at Osric or touches him as he receives a foil. Something.

We need more body based swears. An oath like this just has a natural gesture. It begs to be performed by the body. You cannot say “by this hand” without displaying the hand somehow. We have crossing one’s heart. But no one swears by their leg or their hair or their pelvis or their belly or their sternum.

But it would be kind of beautiful silly dance if they did.

I think there’s a level of wordplay that I am missing here. I can see the metaphor easily – Laertes will be so much better at this than Hamlet, he’ll shine brightly like a star in the dark. And stars are made of fire and they are in the distance – so that all makes sense.

But the stick sticks.

Because a stick can be like a cut – or a hit in this dueling game.

And given what’s about to happen here – the stick feels like an obvious reference. But why is the STAR sticking far off?

Like, it’s so far off from Hamlet’s?

Like Hamlet’s skill is so earthbound and Laertes is WAAAY off in the heavens, stuck and fiery?

I feel like I’m missing a step.

Wokka wokka! A little joke, a little word play before going after one another with swords.

Laertes is sometimes played as humorless – but I can see why he doesn’t want to play this “fun” game right before a fight – and in this moment in particular, in which he’s getting ready to kill him.

So often in these plays, there seems to be no superfluous language – no sentence that doesn’t pack in meaning or purpose. This one, though – feels almost like it’s here just for rhythm. I doubt there’s a real NEED for the “come on.” Except maybe, maybe – to project an air of enthusiasm about this whole duel – an enthusiasm that, likely, Hamlet does not really feel. So – yes, I’ve talked myself into the importance of this line after all. It’s not just rhythm – it’s a projection of confidence and manufactured enthusiasm.

All of a sudden it’s foils?

Laertes’ weapons are rapier and dagger but here we have foils?

What is the sub-narrative here with these weapons?

Is it that Laertes prefers to fight with rapier and dagger but he’s given over to foils for this friendly duel?

I mean, certainly foils are a less threatening weapon. But they’re also less exciting. Is the fight really going to be with broad swords but Hamlet’s making a joke, calling them foils?

There’s a whole story below of weaponry and I’m missing a lot if it. I’d wager most of us are.

How would you play frankly?

Honestly, I guess? No holds barred?

Or, like a fighting game of truth or dare where every time you get a hit, you spill a truth? You confess to a sin or a quality about your opponent that you dislike.

“A hit! A very palpable hit.”
“Okay – I don’t like your haircut!”